This was my favorite moment of the day. Probably one of my only positive moments, that is.
The thing with blogs is you, me, and everyone else only tells the good. "Look at this project. See what my child did. We traveled here and did this and that." I actually had this conversation with my cousin Amanda a couple months ago. We only let others see the positive.
What about Real Life?
Is everyone the perfect mother and enjoys every minute of the day, or is it just me that struggles?
Today ... I was done. I was done with it all. And that was by 8:30 this morning.
I am sure it is just because I have too much going on in my life, that I am stretched to the limit and worn down emotionally. I cry a lot.
Can I unload?
I teach 15 piano students. I am booked solid until mid-November for photo shoots. No free days. I can't keep my house clean. Ben is having a hard time listening and obeying. Reese is a grump because of her ears. I rarely go to bed before 1:00 a.m. and I am up by 6:30 to start my day. Add laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning and scrubbing, bathing, etc. etc. I am not stating anything that you don't know. It's hard work.
I am tired.
So, this was just my "getting real" and letting everyone know that I am not perfect. I suck, actually.
This morning, I was frustrated and crying as I was putting Ben's shoes on (that he refused to do himself - & we were running late to go to the doctor) and I told him I was tired of being the mom. Tonight at dinner, he got teary (now I am crying sitting here at my computer) and asked where he was going to go live. I was momentarily confused and asked what he meant. Well, it was from my comment this morning, nearly 12 hours before. My poor boy thought he was going to be shipped off somewhere else because I was done as a mother.
That breaks my heart.
Why do I have such a hard time? This is what I have always wanted - motherhood. I have so many things to be grateful for, and yet I struggle.
I actually didn't plan to unload. I was going to post this picture to help me to remember the positives. Instead, the world got an earful! I hope it makes you feel better about your life and what you have.