Sunday, December 28, 2008

Limited Time Only!

Eat too much over the holiday's? Gain a few too many pounds? Clothes feeling a little tighter?

Want to get a jump-start on your new years resolution diet?

Want a quick way to shed 15-20 pounds practically overnight?

Well then, come on over to our house & see what it's all about.

If you're looking to make a little extra money, we will pay you to clean our house and interact with our kids.

This is the beginning of your rapid weight loss program.

By this small interaction with our children and our home, you will be infected with the stomach flu virus.

You will have approximately 24-30 hours of vomiting and diarrhea that will give you that jump start you need on losing weight. Sure, it is unpleasant, and you may even feel like dying on more than one occasion - you may even curse the heavens. But if you look at the big picture, it makes those few hours a little more bearable and easier to endure.

The time is limited, and running out fast.

You get paid, we get a clean house & a sitter, you are on your way to a skinnier you! It's a win-win situation.

If you are one of the first 10 callers, we will include a complimentary barf bucket & roll of toilet paper.


Heather Stevenson said...

You're hilarious. I'd take you up on it, but I gotta gain 5 more. Sorry.
Cutest pictures ever!

Leslie said...

very funny post - I almost got a second wind of my own stomach bug when I saw your Food, Glorious Food post this morning - blech! I may have to revisit that post when I feel like eating again.

Crystal said...

Sounds tempting, I think I'll pass though. Although I do need to lose more baby weight. I love your blog, it's so fun to see the kids grow up since we live so far away. Hope you all get feeling better!

Suzanne said...

Sign me up!! Sign me up!! I cannot even fit in my jeans anymore!!! But wait, if I share this with my family, then that would not be good. So sorry you got the barfy's!! Hang in there! Maybe I will come and visit you in a week or so! -Suzanne

Lana said...

Ug... what a drag! I think I'll try becoming anorexic instead! heehee

Mandi said...

OH that sounds awful. I am so sorry. By the way I have your blocks and your hairspray. I know its a miracle!